Attitudes that determine stress
If one possesses the abilities and skills to meet the demands and the opportunity to physically release bodily energies, then one is dealing with positive stress (eustress). This kind of stress can even increase self-confidence and feelings of well-being, resulting in fitness and vitality.
The extent to which pressure situations become negative stress can also depends on the attitudes one has toward these stressors and one's evaluation of them. The extent of perceived strain and pressure is often connected with exaggerated demands placed on oneself.
Attitudes / evaluations that determine stress levels:
Aspirations, preferences and wishes are exaggerated to the point where they become absolute needs and demands, categorical commands such as: "I absolutely must....." or "The others absolutely must...."
Global, negative self-evaluation and global evaluation of others
,,If I/you do not full fill certain demands then..." "...I am nothing, I am worthless...." "...you are a loser, lazy.." or similar thoughts
Low tolerance for frustration perceived lack of ways to cope with the difficulties: "I can't bear it....", "I can't stand it..."
(distortion of the meaning or extent of negative events)
"It is absolutely horrible, dreadful....." "It is terribly bad..." etc.
"I must have everything under control.....",
"I must be absolutely perfect....."
"If I don't perform at 100% then I am useless, I am worthless...."
"No one should notice what is going on inside me....."
"I must meet all the demands placed on me 100%....."
"I can't permit myself to make even the tiniest mistake....."
Many people who suffer from stress expect 100% performance of themselves, or even more, at all times. They are accompanied by a pattern of thought which might be referred to as "must-do thinking"in many areas of their lives. But are such exaggerated evaluation patterns really helpful? Do they really encourage performance?
Exaggerated self-demands can cause inner pressure which eventually leads to a decrease in the person's ability to perform.